Opened the freezing office at 7 am

Made the coffee you always drink then complain

Emailed the staff about your birthday gifts

Dumped your girlfriend on your behalf

She was 19 …. maybe perhaps?

Sent your wife your guilt roses (yeah right, just because)

After all that and actual business duties

Sex from me is what you want ?

Hell no is followed by ‘you’ll lose your job’

The beating of the lizard shall now commence

Followed by a fierce order and no room to escape

You’ll triple my pay or get raped in jail before the trial

The girl was 16, there’s money you hide

Your son’s an employee and only 5!

You over-bill clients and I have all the records

Need I say more sweetheart? Now sweep up that floor!